Our mystery writer Anna Litticks might look like any other mild-mannered corporate employee, but she leads a double life. Behind her unassuming demeanour she hides a secret identity: Datarella, the fearless data scientist.
Armed with python scripts and machine learning algorithms, Datarella battles ignorance and misinformation on her quest to save her company from the perils of data illiteracy. Her superpower? An uncanny ability to decode the mysteries of big data.
In this post, we follow Datarella’s adventures to discover how her sharp intellect, unwavering patience and humour make her a true Data Science heroine:
Automisation means change and “change is bad”
Every business owner or C-suite executive really believes they want answers to their problems.
In my experience, they rarely actually do.
You see, change is normally perceived to be negative. It’s scary and means upheaval. Sometimes, asking the C-suite to change is like asking your partner where they fancy dinner tonight.
They respond whimsically with “I actually fancy a bit of a change.”
You think they mean a different restaurant.
They actually mean a divorce; emigrating to a shack in Bali to give boat tours.
You see, upper management typically wants easily-applicable outcomes and catchphrases that fit the narrative they currently have in their minds.
They’ll pick up on terms like Bayesian Modelling or Machine Learning like these are shiny new iPhones they simply must have for business success.
Once upon a neural network, in the land of corporate cubicles, there lived a mild-mannered, bespectacled woman named Datarella. By day, she appeared to be just another employee, blending in with the sea of office workers. But behind her unassuming demeanour, she was a fearless Data Scientist, armed with a quick wit, a sharp mind, and an uncanny ability to decode the mysteries of big data.
Datarella’s daily quest was to navigate the treacherous terrain of corporate bureaucracy while battling the dark forces of ignorance and misconception. Her weapons of choice were Python scripts and machine learning algorithms, which she wielded with the finesse of a master swordsman.
One fateful day, Datarella found herself summoned to the dreaded Conference Room of Endless Meetings. Her mission: to present her latest findings to the legion of executives known as the PowerPoint Rangers. With a heavy sigh, she prepared herself for the onslaught of misguided questions and well-intended but utterly unhelpful suggestions.
As she began her presentation, a hush fell over the room. The Rangers listened intently, eyes widening as she unveiled complex data visualisations and sophisticated models. But Datarella’s true test lay in her ability to translate her findings into the universal language of business jargon.
“Ah, so what you’re saying is, we need to pivot our paradigm and synergize our core competencies to maximise our ROI?” asked one PowerPoint Ranger, stroking his chin thoughtfully.
Datarella suppressed a grin. “Precisely,” she replied, as she continued to weave a tale of strategic action items, stakeholder engagement, and value propositions. Her audience nodded in unison, captivated by her mastery of their native tongue.
With the meeting concluded, Datarella returned to her cubicle sanctuary, having once again saved the company from the perils of data illiteracy. As she settled back into her ergonomic chair, she couldn’t help but chuckle at the absurdity of her double life.
From deciphering the cryptic messages hidden in the coffee-stained scrolls of company databases to defending her realm from the barbaric onslaught of Excel fanatics, Datarella’s adventures were never dull. But she wouldn’t have it any other way.
For in the vast, unpredictable world of corporate life, there was one constant: the unyielding spirit of Datarella, Data Scientist extraordinaire, forever battling the forces of confusion with her sharp intellect, unwavering patience, and a healthy dose of humour.
Until next time,
